Jealousy: Relationship Help With Jealousy, Self-Esteem, Insecurity and Trust Issues by Robert RainToo short to discover the source of the problem
The book is informative and written in a very easy to read style. But it has only 25 pages, which is definitely not enough to give you an idea what could be the true source of your jealousy. Its something good to start with, it leaves you with few thoughts of what you maybe should focus on when dealing with your jealousy. What I liked in this book was quick tips how to deal with your or your partners jealousy (the book also considers your partners point of view) and when the feeling of jealousy might me good (as a red flag for your partners behavior). But anyway, it touches only the top of the iceberg.
How to Cope With Jealousy
How can jealousy and insecurity affect my relationship?
Problems with jealousy and insecurity can be signs that there are trust issues in a relationship. That being said, both are normal emotions that we're all equipped to feel. It's important in any relationship that you understand the origin of these feelings and recognize if they seem to be justified based on your partner's behavior. Sometimes because of past hurt, infidelity or mistreatment, we anticipate that our current partner will recreate that pain. To avoid being hurt, we can express our insecurities and jealous feelings in both positive and negative ways.
Are you having issues with jealousy and insecurity? Is it affecting your relationship with your partner? What causes it? Infidelity and often subsequent conflict and divorce are part of the relationship template they developed as a child. In therapy, they can often rework their template to be based on more current information about their own partner. If a child feels that his or her brother or sister is favored, that child may develop believing that he or she is not enough and someone else will be favored.
Acting overbearing and possessive can change a loving relationship into one filled with envy, terror and control. Possessiveness comes from feelings of insecurity in a relationship. This person doubts the other out of his or her own negative feelings and, as a result, will become consumed with jealousy. This jealousy will grow into control. This is not only a concept found in intimate relationships, but friendships as well. The trouble with this is that the more overbearing a person acts, the more the other person will try to break free. The inherent problem is the controlling person is actually just pushing his or her partner further and further away, expecting the counterpart to conform to his or her values, wishes and beliefs.
How to stop being jealous today before this relationship parasite eats away your love life
But his insane jealousy is going to tear us apart unless something changes. Kevin admitted that when they went out in public, he would insist she sit toward a wall so that she couldn't see or be seen by other potential attractive mates. If he caught her chatting or joking with male neighbours or colleagues, he would assume right off she was having an affair. She had stopped seeing a really good male friend she'd known since childhood and he'd "banned" her from chatting to a year-old married man who lived next door. This was maddening.